It's A Game To Them
Women often view men picking them up as a sort of game. I mean when you look at it, there are all these "rules" men have come to follow. Some cheat, some try to edge things in their favor. Women talk about it with eachother. They have standard lines they learn when you ask them for their number. "Why don't you give me YOUR number instead and I can call you?"
I know that some, maybe even most women go out on weekends with the mindset of "I'm never going to meet Mr. Right at a club, but it boosts my ego to have men paying attention to me by the dozens, and I like to have free drinks. I love to dance with my girlfriends and be a tease. I love the power of shooting men down while pretending to be annoyed by it..." etc. I recently answered the question "What is it about fame and money and power that attracts women?" Women are attracted to this for a REASON. My opinion is that they believe on a genetically and socially programmed, unconscious level that these men are more intelligent, more fun, more interesting, more able to give them the liftestyle - and MOST IMPORTANTLY - give them the FEELINGS that they want. In his book "Influence" Robert Cialdini talks about a psychological principle called the 'Halo Effect.' In a nutshell, humans naturally assume that attractive and powerful people are smarter and more trustworthy than average people.
A woman desires a man that fits into her self image fantasies that have been forming since she was pretty young. And thanks to Disney these fantasies were imbedded even further than her genetic wiring ever intended lol.
Give a women those FEELINGS she's looking for and she'll treat you much the same. You need to learn how to push the button inside of women that creates these feelings. While women are interested in looks to some degree, they're more interested in how you make them feel. You must behave as if you confidently believe that you are the best thing for a woman, that you are going to make her feel wonderful inside. Women pick up on this and they respond to it.
Ask yourself the following few q's:
How would I walk if I believed I could make any women feel great inside?
How would I talk if I believed I could make any women feel great inside?
What would the expression be on my face if I believed that I could make any woman feel great inside?
How would I act differently if I were the kind of man that women dreamed about?
Then start doing these things. When you're talking to a woman just imagine how good you're going to make her feel.
Fake it till you make it. Just do it. Women will notice,.
Women Don't Make Sense
I know I know, every woman is a unique creature. Don't sent me hate mail just yet. However women have more similarities than they do differences. Let's start with what they have in common.
This is something very clear from the start: Most women THINK differently than most ment, and most women want different things than most men. Simple enough right? Regardless this is very hard for most men to grasp or understand. The sooner you get a handle on this, the sooner you'll be more successful with women. Let's start by going through what women are interested in.
Have you ever stopped to think about what entertains women as a group compared to what entertains guys? Women buy Cosmo, watch soap operas, and read romance novels. Men buy Playboy/Maxim, watch sports, read the paper and play games.
WOAH wait a minute! What's in those Cosmos, soaps, and novels that's so attractive to them? Why when men try to read these things we always go "I don't get it...."
I'll tell you why. It's because women's brains are wired differently than ours. Once again you might realize this, but most men don't. By telling you what attracts women's attention, I've just also given you a clue about how to attract them to YOU.
Social conditioning plays a huge role. Read some books or article on the Myers-Briggs Type Inficator or try the book "Who Am I?" However women got interested in these things, most women have a few main interests, needs, desires, or whatever you want to call them when it comes to men, relationships and romance.
Have you ever read the personals online or otherwise? Notice how women say things like "princess looking for prince," "friends first," and "looking for my soul-mate?" Notice how almost no men say these things? What's going on???
Ever listen to a group of women talking about men? They speak largely in some kind of code language about trivial details that seem totally irrelevant. Have you ever noticed, on the other hand, how men are direct with each other and have no interest in bickering over small things? Take a good moment to think about how attracted to drama most girls are. How many "dramatic" girls do you know, or who get involved in dramatic situations? Here's my take on this whole subject:
Women are playing out a role that hasn't changed for thousands of years. These days the clothing and language are different, but it's the same as it's always been. There are different parts of the human brain that create drives and desires for different things. Often these drives conflict with eachother. For instance, a woman might want a strong man in her life but she might also want a feeling of independence. She might want to have attention, but she might also want to be seen as above needing attention (not high maintenence). (Men have these conflicts too, just in different areas). Men often say "I hate all the drama women create/facilitate. Why do they create it!?"
My answer: Drama accomplishes a lot of things at once. It gets attention, sends emotions through the body (emotions are highly addictive chemicals!), it's a way to be self righteous, it's often fun, it's interesting and it prevents boredom, it gives things meaning...and on and on. There are a lot of good reasons for drama, but most men can't understand them because it fulfills needs that MOST MEN DON'T HAVE!
It's just like when women say "I hate it when all a guy can talk about it sports!" What needs do sports fulfill for us men? Competition, adrenaline, power, domination...all the typical guy stuff. Incidentally, stuff that fulfills needs that WOMEN just plain fon't have. Now it's time to shift your thinking.
Think about the women you're interested in. What she needs and wants. Don't assume it's the same things you need and want. This will most likely never make complete sense. I confess it still doesn't to ME! I realize though, that it doesn't matter what makes sense.
All that matters is WHAT WORKS.
Let's get a little deeper into the female heart and mind. Remember this is all my perspective but I've talked with tons of women about this and they've all said I'm dead on. Females select males most of the time in natrure...and in modern courtship too. Even if the man selects the women, most women harbor the secret fantasy "that they're letting him do it." What most men don't understand is that they're the selector, and not the selectee. It's a very very powerful thing and it points something out to a woman that she's likely never heard from a man in her life. Refer to this fact often and subtly.
My personal view is that if you help peopl eto have profound realizations, they'll see you as a guru rather than seeing the information or themselves as powerful. It doesnt' matter where the info came from, as long as it's something the person has never really thought about in that way (that's also profound to her).
One of my best examples is when I'm talking to a very attractive girl who's acting arrogant. I say to them "You don't have me fooled for a minute." She'll reply "What are you talking about??" "Well I know that most men fall for this 'I'm beautiful and aloof and I get my way' part of your personality...But I know something none of them know...that there's another side of you. A side that none of them get to see. I'll bet you a dollar right now that I know something about you that no one whos known you for only 5 minutes has EVER known....::pause pause:: You may act tough but you're actually EXTREMELY sensitive on the inside. If someone makes a negative comment to you, you might act like it doesn't bother you...but you'll think about it all the way home..I know you're secretly as sensitive as a little girl...It's just that most people never get to meet that part of you.
This messes up a cold woman soooooo much. Don't be surprised if there's an instant personality meltdown, it's happened often to me. Start dropping comments about how women play men, this shows you as an insider hip to their game, and a few more comments in you'll have a woman who won't leave you alone. Of course keep acting like you want to be left along so she'll stay after you. Nice eh?
This is the start. I am finally beginning "Your Awesome Self," the guide to Life, Success and Women. I hope you enjoy and benefit from the advice I am going to share here.
