How Did That Make You Feel?Feelings, Wohwohwoh, Feelings !
That's how the line to an old song goes and for most women, it's a very important part of their makeup.
Guys rarely express their feelings with each other or with women, but women live on a very emotional level.
If you're having a conversation with a girl you just met (and I don't mean banalities shouted over the sound of loud bar music) just about anything she tells you can be answered with: "How did that make you feel?"
I know, maybe that makes you sound like a psychiatrist, but most people will be surprised that anyone bothered to ask them about their feelings. Quite often, no one has asked them that question and often they've never even asked themselves. This gives women the idea that you actually care about them and they will answer truthfully most of the time, opening their vulnerable emotional side to you.
This means you have gained a measure of trust; but don't take that responsibility lightly -- mean it!
Listening can't be faked. You have to have eye contact, nod your head, really listen sincerely, and give the intellectual and sympathetic response as the conversation continues.
We like the people who like us. It's that simple. Anyone's favorite topic of conversation is themselves. Even beautiful women are full of insecurities and feel no one understands them. Once you establish an emotional bond and connect with their feelings, you have taken a big step to the next level, have become a good friend, and are moving toward a romantic relationship.
Take just a quick minute and think about something.
What makes gold so great? Or diamonds? What makes a diamond so much more special than a cubic zirconia? Both are shiny. Both are "pretty." So why is a diamond so much more expensive? Why is it so valuable?
BECAUSE IT'S RARE.
People want things that they see as rare. Diamonds are rare. If amethyst was more difficult to find than diamonds, I guarantee people would be getting on one knee with an amethyst engagement ring. Diamonds are rare and therefore, valuable. It's the law of supply and demand.
What does this mean to a DJ?
Be rare. Be a diamond. Be different than the others. Amongst all the other lumps of coal (other guys) you are the diamond. You stand out, above and beyond all the others. Learn to play an instrument, learn comedy, learn a foreign language. Do something that will make her say, "Here's something different."
Once she sees how interesting you are, pull back. If she wants you, she's going to have to work for you.
Ever go to college? If so, you can pick out the ones whose parents are paying for their school versus the kids who are either paying for it themselves or are on scholarships that require good grades. The ones who have things given to them don't appreciate what they have as much as the ones who have to work for what they want. If she has to work to get to you, she'll appreciate you much more once you *LET* her have you.
Remember, to be valuable, you have to be rare. People take for granted the things that are always there. Don't always be there.
Be rare. Be a diamond.
